Indeed, Allah has created children with a pure innate nature, and whatever defects that sink in later on are due to a number of reasons. The Prophet, peace and blessings be upon him, is reported to have said, “Every child is born on Fitrah (man’s innate disposition to monotheism), his parents make him Jewish, Christian or a fire worshipper.” (Reported by Al-Bukhari and Muslim)
Islaam commands the parents to take care of their children and to bring them up according to Islamic manners. Allah, the Almighty, has entrusted parents with their children. Therefore, parents bear the responsibility to raise up their children in the Islamic way. If they do so, they will be, Allah Willing, blessed in this life and the Hereafter. If they don’t, they may see the bad results of it during their life, and Allah forbid, in the Hereafter.
The Prophet (peace and blessings be upon him) is reported to have said, “All of you are guardians and all of you are responsible for things under your guardianship; the ruler is a guardian (managing his state’s affairs) and he is responsible for things under his care, the man is a guardian over his family and responsible for them, the woman is a guardian of her husband’s house and she is responsible for it. All of you are guardians and responsible for things under your control.” (Reported by Al-Bukhari and Muslim)
The Prophet, peace and blessings be upon him, did not excuse anyone from a responsibility that Allah (the Almighty) has put on an individual. The ruler is responsible, the man and woman are responsible… all within their capabilities, domains, and authorities. Sadly, the loss of true Islaam from our Muslim Ummah these days is nothing but a result of the neglect of this responsibility. Men and women, fathers and mothers, share the responsibility to raise, educate, and build the new generation in the correct method and the right way.
The human has in him both the good and bad tendencies; therefore, parents must encourage and refine the good tendencies in their children. Referring to this, Allah Almighty says, {O you who believe, protect yourselves and your families from a fire whose fuel is men and stones. } (At-Tahreem: 6)
The protection of yourself and your family from Hell-Fire can be done by good Islamic education, the practice of good morals and nobility.
Islaam does not distinguish between male and female with regard to education requirements. The Prophet (peace and blessings be upon him) is reported to have said, “Whoever has a daughter, tutors her on good morals, educates her well and feeds her properly, she will be a protection for him from Hell-Fire.”
Methods
1-Show your child the value of good deeds and their affect on the individuals and society. Also demonstrating the effects of bad deeds, while taking into account the child’s capability of understanding.
2-Parents should be a good example in their behavior because children like to imitate their parents in their words and actions.
3-Teach your child the religious principles and tutor them in worship, again taking into account the child’s capability of understanding. The Prophet (peace and blessings be upon him) is reported to have said,
“Order your children to pray at the age of seven.”
4-Treat your children lovingly and kindly. The Prophet (peace and blessings be upon him) taught us this practically.
When he was praying as an Imaam with the people, his grandson al-Hasan, son of his daughter Faatimah, may Allah be pleased with them both, climbed on his back while he was bowing. The Prophet, peace and blessings be upon him, lengthened his Rukoo’. When he finished his prayer, some Companions said, “You lengthened your bow?” Then the Prophet, peace and blessings be upon him, answered, “My grandson rode my back and I hate hastening him”
5-One of the important things that parents must teach their children is to choose good company and to the avoid bad company, as children are always influenced by the company they keep. Bad behavior can be easily transmitted through bad company; the Prophet, peace and blessings be upon him, warned us by saying,
“Man is inclined to get influenced by his friend’s manners, so one must be careful in choosing friends.” (Reported by Abu Dawud & At-Tirmidhi)
6-Encourage your child’s sense of belonging to the Muslim Ummah, by teaching him/her the importance of brotherhood and sisterhood between Muslims. Teaching your child to care for the Muslims, be they from or in any land. Make him/her feel like they are apart of the Muslim body; to feel joy when Muslims are joyous, to feel sad for Muslims’ sadness, and to do their best to achieve the Muslim Ummah’s goals.
Practical Tips
A- Take children to Masaajid and introduce them to their brothers/sisters in Islaam regardless of race, language, or origin.
B- Teach children the history of the Prophet, peace and blessings be upon him, his Companions and the history of the Prophets. Keeping in mind the child’s capability of understanding.
C- Encourage children to sympathize with Muslims and to contribute to the solutions Muslims face, such as poverty by donating some money to poor Muslim children.
D- Take part in celebrations, picnics and festivals with Muslims, especially with children of the same age.
E- Imbue in children the feeling of love for Allah, His Prophets, Muslims, and righteous deeds. This love, Allah Willing, will lead to special behavior towards and for all those loved.
The above are general guidelines which will hopefully help parents accomplish the job entrusted to them by Allah Almighty and His Messenger (peace be upon him).
Surely, the standing infront of Allah Almighty is near indeed,
{And say, “Do deeds! Allah will see your deeds, and (so will) his Messenger and the believers. And you will be brought back to the All-Knower of the unseen and the seen. Then He will inform you of what you used to do.” } (At-Tawbah: 105)